Wednesday, January 20, 2016

A Professional in the Moving Industry

I'm not sure where I belong just yet, but I don't think it's Boston anymore.

I'm just going to start things off by coming right out and saying it:

After 13 years of living in Boston and an entire lifetime living in New England, I'll be moving across the country with Cody sometime within the next few weeks.

We've been weighing the pros and cons of making this decision for a pretty long time now, and as of two days ago, we finally decided concretely that we want to go for it.  This probably doesn't come as a surprise to anyone who knows me to any degree in real life - I have been talking about how I want to spread my wings and leave New England for years now.

I've only told a few people in my life so far, and I ran into a similar problem that I did when I transitioned.  It's a pretty major life decision, and in order to move forward on it I want to tell all of the important people in my life, but it's really hard to do this without repeating a lot of the same answers to a lot of the same question.  You can only really answer things like "are you going to the surgery?" so many times before it gets old fast.  

My solution to that was to write it all in a blog.  That way, instead of constantly having to tell the same stories over and over, all I would need to do is share a link to anyone who had questions. The blog became my number one tool in building up a support system during my transition.  There's something to be said about writing out one's entire thought process while going through a process that people don't have a lot of experience with.

What perfect timing, right?  I have a blog that I'm struggling to motivate myself to share with others, and an important life update that I want to convey to pretty much everyone I know.

I wrote this one week before I left Connecticut for good.

Without further ado:


Where are you guys moving?

We're aiming for the Pacific Northwest - his best friend currently lives in Portland and mine currently lives in Seattle, so right now we're aiming for somewhere in the general vicinity but aren't married to anything just yet.  

When are you guys moving?

I gave notice at my job and my last day will be Thursday, January 28th.  The final walk-through for our apartment is on the Monday, February 1st.  After that, we're officially living life on the road for a little while.

Yeah, right.  Don't you say that every year?


I do.  I have always abstractly talked about how I one day want to move to another part of the country to experience something different.  I've even come this close to moving to Denver with Kayla before, going so far as to not renew my lease and give notice to my job before the circumstances changed and we found out we couldn't go.

My attitudes regarding moving and blogging are the same.  They're both things that I want to do and enjoy talking about doing, but when it comes to follow-through, I'm scared of failure.  Or, more accurately, I'm scared of being viewed as a failure.  That's fine - as long as I don't let it stop me.

What are you planning to do for money?

The main idea is to build up Cody's online store, Misfit Cords.  Cody has been working from home on the store for a little bit less than a year, and I have faith that with the two of us working on it together, we'll be able to bring in enough money to make a happy living.

Why don't you just stay in Boston and do it from there?

The rent here is ridiculously expensive, driving here is a nightmare, and the weather throughout the winter is something I no longer want to deal with.  But more to the point, I think I'm just sick of living in Boston.  I thrive on new experiences, and I feel like I've seen everything that Boston/New England has to offer at this point.  Right now, the unpredictability that comes with living somewhere new is the thing that I want the most.

What if something goes wrong?

The risk of leaving my friends/family/job, in February, to drive across the country without a destination in mind isn't lost on me.  I'm fully aware of the things that can go wrong - what if we run out of money?  What if the car breaks down or one or both of us get sick on the road?  What if I discover that my happiness in life comes from the things I have in Boston, and I'm throwing it away for nothing?

That said, there's always reasons not to take risks.  If they didn't exist, they wouldn't be risks!  But I truly feel that taking risks is the only way to ultimately experience success.

I've been putting this off for years already, and I finally feel ready for this.  If something unexpected happens - and it's almost guaranteed that something will - then I'll figure it out and learn a lesson along the way.  I went through the same wave of self-doubt before I transitioned, and the lesson I took from it was to embrace the risk of failure as a chance to grow stronger.

Will you miss Boston?

Of course!  The main thing that's stopped me from leaving is that, by most metrics, my life up here is pretty good.  The decision to leave here didn't come lightly.  It's time, though.

So where do things stand right now?

Right now, I have three major priorities:

  1. Sorting our stuff into "sell", "keep", "store", and "trash" piles
  2. Trying to see all of the important people in my life in the area at least one more time before leaving
  3. Making sure my affairs are in order - letting people know I'm leaving, seeing my doctor, getting my car tuned up, preparing things for the next person to take my job...stuff like that.
What's the best way to keep in touch with you after you move?

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