Trans*-Related

This is an archive of all of my posts related to my gender transition.  I wanted to put all of these posts in a single place so that they might serve as a resource for people who might be looking for stories from someone who transitioned happily.

Entries marked with a * are my personal favorites.
Paying It Forward - I only recently discovered Trans Lifeline and love what they do, so Cody and I decided to try and run a raffle to raise money for them.  Click here for a chance to win some of Cody's art for a good cause!

Asking the Right Question - I used to question whether or not I counted as transgender, since I didn't fit the mold of "woman trapped in a man's body", until I realized that the answer to that question didn't really matter nearly as much as whether or not I was happy with my life overall.

Access and Allies - This post is for people who have recently had someone in their life come out as gender-questioning, and how I think can they be as helpful as they possibly can.

Transcendence* -  I have a fair number of transgender friends.  They span from people like me who are more or less done with it, to people like my friend Ellen who only recently started questioning her gender. While I admit that I came from privilege - I had a lot of support from my family and friends, and have only lived in progressive parts of the country - I feel like that makes it my responsibility share my story and promote an approach where we humanize each other in order to have productive conversations.

Making Sense of It All - This is a post where I attempt to use some of the lessons that I learned during coming out when I was transitioning to help people have productive conversations with people who might have negative bias against trans* people.

Mike Drop* - (From the Archives)  My last two Livejournal posts, written back in 2007, as I prepared to leave my "male" blog in favor of a "female" one.  This was how I came out, once and for all, to my social circle at the time.

Coming Out of MyShell - (From the Archives) An old blog post that I wrote back in 2009 about accidentally outing myself as a transwoman on an online forum that wasn't necessarily tolerant of it, and what I learned by sticking up for myself instead of running away.

Asterisks and Rewards - After I had gender reassignment surgery, I thought that dating would be easier.  It wasn't.  Even though I passed as female and was more popular and social than I had ever been, I had no idea how approach dating or sex or relationships and it made me feel incredibly insecure.  This is a story about what I learned from that period in my life and how I eventually chose to approach searching for a life partner.

Rolling Forward, part 1* - MDMA (commonly known as 'ecstasy' or 'molly') played an extremely important role in my life, giving me the courage the come out to my friends and the peace of mind to acknowledge that transitioning was my only chance of happiness.  Let it be clear - people should educate themselves and make their own decisions about the usefulness of MDMA.  I'm only writing this to give an honest account of a life experience that people don't talk about publicly very often. 

Foreshadowing - This is a post written early on about some of the frustrations I've experienced with the stigma against transgender people, and how I planned to use it to inspire me to write.  Ironically enough, I named it before I realized that I would be describe what I wanted to do to my blog six months later.

Typical Shelly Fashion, part 2* - This has to be the blog post that I share the most.  It's a picture overview of my transition from male to female, spanning from 2005 to 2016.  It covers the four relevant phases of my life:  nerdy male gamer, normal everyday woman, hippie chick, and androgynous wizard.  If you or anyone you know believes that it's impossible to transition and lead a happy life, please feel free to show them this post to disprove that.

On Judging Books By Their Covers, part 1 - I've long since maintained that the best way for people to understand sexual/gender identities is to compare them to left-handedness.  They're all traits that are probably genetic and indicate a preference - so why do we treat them so differently?  This was one of my first ever blog posts, so the formatting is a little bit weird, but I stand by the point I was trying to make.